Neighbors

They have always been there, lurking in the shadows, waiting for you to open your window. Just waiting for you to let the dog out or even pick up the paper. You know exactly what I am talking about. I don't know about you but if my dog is waking me up to go outside to do her business before I have had an opportunity to do mine that is a recipe for disaster. But it never fails . "Oh man she will pee on the floor if I don't get her out, But I really need to get in the crapper pretty quick" OK take the chance... slip robe on and head out don't even have coffee yet . Then out of no where there they are , the neighbors. And when do they show up? Right as you have stretched and let a fart slip. And no this isn't one of those you can cover up. Like the lady at the Hotel the other night, she was a sneeze fart er she sneezed and farted so loud it started an echo in the lobby of the hotel. It was bad made the front desk agent drop the phone and I dropped a tool and almost shorted out the phone system. Bend over to pick up the paper pooooooofo oops you look around. There's the neighbor.  No sense trying to cover it up whats done is done.One of those moments ,your alone, you need to crap. Go to the head and then it happens " KNOCK KNOCK" I really don't think that prison time would suit me so I sat there. He walked in  I am not kidding calling my name. There I am on the crapper. He hollers" Hey where are you" I replied "in the crapper" And in he came ,opened the frigging door and came in. Is there nothing sacred. I was taking a shit. Not a tiny poo, this was a full grown man sure enough dump.Something has to be done about these people..More on this tomorrow.